No, not mine, Mrs. Macabre niece's! Elizabeth has asked that her and her fiance be married:
A: On Hallowe'en night
B: In the Final Unresting Place Cemetery with ghosts, fog and tombstones.
To say that I am honored and overjoyed is an understatement! I like her beau, he's just an all-around nice guy and although she's gone through some rough times in her life, she's straightened out and doing wonderfully. So now I'm going to be part wedding planner with no experience at all...ain't stopped me before!
Alright you bridesmaids, you can cut off your fluorescent lime green dresses to tea length and wear them again. Yes I know they're snug, if you can still breathe, there's room for more cinching! Alright Liz, what did I tell you about eating 3 weeks before the wedding? No food, only diet water! You want everyone to turn and say 'my she looks so thin'. Where's the ringbearer? Where's the ringbearer's sedatives?! People, this is HER day, if you screw it up I will kill you all and hide your bodies so you won't get a proper burial! Now this is a happy day for her D@^^^^!+ , smile like you mean it or I'll get a tire iron out of my trunk and MAKE you smile! Groomsmen, either stand up straight with no slouching or I'll take my Louisville Slugger to your kneecaps and give you something to slouch about!
I think I might like this!